The Quickest Way to Recover From Feeling Trapped and Burned Out

One thing I learned from self-help pioneer Louise Hay, author of How to Love Yourself, (and countless other self-help books), is that the quickest way to recover from feeling trapped and burned out is to discover (or rediscover), who you are and love yourself for it.  It’s amazing how we change our energy and what we attract when we shift how we view and care for ourselves.


In a blog post I wrote earlier this year, I introduced you to the idea of operating from energy vs. effort.  In that post, I asked you which of these 2 formulas were you following at your job…


Aptitude (what you can do)

+ Motivation (what you can gain or need to perform)

= Effort (hard work)




Attitude (what you believe about yourself and others)

+ Intention (what you believe others can gain as a result of your contributions)

= Energy (what you effortlessly give to others and attract for yourself in return)


Here’s a secret I didn’t share with you in that post – neither formula works optimally without one more factor.  That factor is fulfillment.


Fulfillment, in the sense I am referring to, is defined in the dictionary as follows:

  • to make full
  • to meet the requirements of 


Practicing fulfillment is about caring for yourself – giving yourself what you need in order to do what you do.  Living and working without a steady stream of fulfillment is like expecting a car to drive without gas.



Self-love and fulfillment isn’t about loving yourself in spite of others.  It’s about giving yourself what you need in order to do what you do for others.  As a said in another blog post about fulfillment, when we don’t feel that we have reliable, on-going access to what fills us up, we will feel like we are not in control.  We also may be susceptible to constantly trying to fulfill others expectations of us – and that alone is exhausting.  That’s like living in a messy, rundown hotel room for an extended stay.  At some point, you’re just gonna wanna go home – home as in return to yourself and what fulfills you.  The truth is, everything we do either adds to or takes away from our sense of fulfillment.  Too often, we allow ourselves to do things that drain us yet we do nothing to restore ourselves.


We must love ourselves in order to love our work or anyone/thing else.  Giving into stress (the corporate-speak word for fear), disconnects us from understanding who we are, what we intend for others, and what we can do for ourselves to ensure we have the full ability to do what we do for ourselves and others both at work and in our personal lives. In the work environment, it can be easy to make what others think of you be the ultimate marker of our credibility and worthiness.  If we do this we are in trouble because jobs are filled with people who don’t love and accept us – especially when we are not clear about what we intend for their well-being.


Answers about who we are, what we intend, and what we want exist only within ourselves.  So, if we have been focused on allowing markers of success (an admiring boss or peers, happy customers, a big paycheck, fancy office, impressive title, etc.), to define if we are competent, valuable/worthy, or even just a good person, then we weaken our ability to go within and easily see the components of the formula for sustainable happiness and success.


The components of:

  • our intentions
  • what fulfills us
  • our attitude


….determine the magnitude of the energy to attract what we want vs. what we don’t want.  If any one of these 3 components is unclear or negatively skewed (focused on what you don’t want), then our energy will be weak and our ability to attract what we want will be sluggish at best.


Our sources of fulfillment from our place of employment will be different from our sources of fulfillment in our personal life.  I’ll talk more about how sources of fulfillment from our professional and personal lives are distinct in my next blog post.


What’s important to know from this blog post is that when you regularly restore your fulfillment tank you protect yourself from feeling exhausted, cynical, and powerless to get anything done and enable yourself to build your energy, confidence and sense of personal power – no matter what’s happening around you!


Restoring our fulfillment tank happens when we nurture ourselves in getting what enables us to do all the things we do. Nurturing ourselves is as simple as being patient with ourselves as we discover what fulfills us and choosing in favor of those things as often as we feel the need to.


This doesn’t mean we always get what fulfills us.  We all know times when the world around us just doesn’t seem to be on our side – emergencies happen, people change their mind, friends and family members need our attention, etc.


Turns out, the world aligning perfectly so that we get what we want all the time isn’t what matters most anyway.  What matters more for building our energy is the act of discovering what fills you up and then choosing in favor of it.  Don’t get me wrong, getting what brings us fulfillment matters big time too!  The truth is, the clearer you become about what fills your tank and the more often you choose in favor of it is what shifts your energy and assures your likelihood that you will actually get it.  This is an important distinction because it’s the discovery of what fills you up and the choosing in favor of it that’s in your control – that’s what builds confidence and a sense of personal power.


When things work out in your favor it doesn’t mean you identified ‘good’ sources of fulfillment.  And on the contrary, when things work out not so great it doesn’t mean your sources of fulfillment are “off” or that you don’t deserve to have what you want.  Just know that something better is available to you AND it will show up in a way you can recognize – that is practicing faith in the energy of the Universe (way more powerful than just having faith in the energy of yourself).


As I said, doing what it takes to build your energy (getting clear about your intentions, giving yourself what you need to fill your gas tank, and keeping your attitude aligned with what you want), builds your confidence and power.  It heals confusion, indecision, exhaustion, cynicism, and powerlessness because it consciously connects you to what you WANT to experience – not what you don’t want to experience.


When you are feeling like you have run out of gas, give yourself a moment to breath, and let information about what would restore your gas tank reveal itself to you.  Then choose in favor of getting that for yourself.  Learn to give yourself what you need without judgement.


When we learn to recognize when we are out of gas, to stop judging that as bad, and just take it as a clue that it’s time to give ourselves what we need to fuel up, that too is a way to amp up our energy.  Anything going on in our life or work that’s contrary to that or that’s holding us back from recharging will effortlessly drift away.   Feeling unfulfilled is the call to focus less on what we think others want from us and to focus more on discovering what we want to give to others AND to ourselves.




Give yourself everything you can to keep a steady stream of positive energy flowing into your tank – it’s easy when you take The Passion Test step-by-step, live with me!


The Passion Test is the #1 process worldwide for discovering and unleashing things that fill your fuel tank.  It’s simple, powerful, and fun to do!  During this program you’ll discover:


Clarity about your 5 things that can fill up your energy tank (with premium gas), plus the tools to effortlessly choose in favor of them – without guilt!


If you feel ready to put some gas in your tank – then you will love taking The Passion Test!


Here’s what I’ve heard people say about taking The Passion Test:


  • “I learned HOW to make choices that make me feel aligned with what matters most to me”
  • “I feel reconnected with passions that I have lost site of because I let other people’s needs and agendas take me over”
  • “I let go of the guilt of doing what I love”


The Passion Test offers you the opportunity to:

  • connect to what matters most for you to feel fulfilled in the life you have right now – get some energy in your empty fulfillment tank!
  • get your priorities for happiness and success straight
  • live life from what matters most to you (and stop living from everyone else’s agenda)


$297 includes:  downloadable video to prepare for your coaching sessions, 1 download of a .pdf tool, plus 2 live up to 60 minute video-conferencing coaching sessions live with me.


Email me at to register!

About Gina Calvano

Gina Calvano is a certified coach and Senior Professional in Human Resources, with over 20 years of experience as a talent management professional in both the private and non-profit sectors. With a unique approach, she combines her strategic corporate expertise and accreditations with metaphysics and transformational thinking which has resulted in people all over the world feeling good about themselves and connected to a sense of purpose.

She created the Success Readiness Bootcamp™, a step by step process that enables people to easily discover their unique talents and abilities and match them to majors, jobs, industries and leisure pursuits. Gina is also the co-author of Breakthrough! Inspirational Strategies for an Audaciously Authentic Life with NY Times Best Selling Authors Marci Shimoff, Janet Bray Attwood and Chris Attwood and Powerful Connections Made Easy™ with Aprille Trupiano, and is currently working on her next book — Caged in My Cube: The Turnaround Guide For Loving The Job You Hate.

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