Feeling like you are fighting for survival at your job?

Ever feel like you are a lone soldier battling for survival at your job?  There you are day in and out on a vast battlefield  – just you against your job (the work, your boss, the culture in which you work, etc.), that seems to require you to think, act and be a way that seems so counter to who you really are.


The job that doesn’t seem to value your unique, bold and direct way of making a difference – at all.  Or, the job that doesn’t appreciate that you have bent and flexed – and maybe even abandoned – your principles and talents in an effort to make others happy.


“When will this end??” is the thought goes through your mind over and over every day.


If you feel that way, then the path to peace may very well be to bring your preferred (and seemingly opposite) energy to the scene.  Do you have a masculine style burying a feminine energy preference – or vice versa?


First, let me explain to you in my own simple, short way how these 2 energies behave – or what they intend – when they are functioning in a balanced way…


Masculine energy is more independent and directive.  It serves through providing strength, consistency, and decisiveness.  It’s energy is willing to be confrontational in order to restore peace.  It’s more easily in tune with, shares it’s perspective, and takes action based on what is happening around itself to ultimately lead, guide or protect itself and/or others.


Feminine energy is more harmonious and receptive.  It serves through providing nurturing, accommodation, and flexibility.  It’s energy is willing to submit in order to restore peace.  It’s more easily in tune with, shares it’s perspective, and remains still to connect with what is happening within itself to ultimately lead, guide or protect itself and/or others.


Neither energy feels fully purposed or functions optimally without the other energy to interact with.


The preference for one energy over the other has nothing to do with gender.  AND we will abandon our preferred energy if we think the opposite energy is what we need to be in order to “survive”.  This can wreak havoc within ourselves and within our relationships – even if our “partner” is our job.


How can that be?


Problems can arise when “partners” prefer or engage in the same energy – especially if they do so in an unbalanced way – for instance, if one (or both) take on non-preferred energy as a means to “survive” some life circumstance.  “Survival” mode kicks in when you become unbalanced – disconnected with operating from a “higher purpose” – meaning, not staying strong in your preferred, balanced energy despite the seemingly overpowering, unbalanced opposite energy you face from time to time in life.


So not only do masculine and feminine energy need each other, they need “higher purpose” energy too.  “Higher purpose” energy provides the “balancing” effect.  It keeps each energy from becoming too excessive or too insufficient.


“Higher purpose” energy  may appear like a connection to God, universe, higher-self, greater consciousness, mission/vision/values, etc. It’s energy that puts and keeps us in a virtuous, well-intending mindset that considers the wants and needs of those we serve/interact with.


Whatever the reason partners come to interact with similar unbalanced energy – the truth is the energies do not become allies on the same battlefield – they become enemies against each other.


Think about organizations, couples you know, groups you may have affiliated with where there is an overabundance (or insufficient level) of masculine or feminine energy – was there harmony and productivity – or was there a lot of “red tape”, arguing and political BS?


Are you feeling like you are on a battlefield with your significant “partner” (or “enemy”) in life?  This “enemy” might be your spouse or significant other – but might it also be represented by your boss or the environmental culture at the organization you work for …


your job – yes, the very nature of your work and you may feel at odds!


Are you feeling like you are fighting for survival at your job?


Can you lay your weapons down, get back into balanced masculine/feminine energy and recommit to your job?


  • Evaluate which energy you seem to predominately be approaching your job (your “enemy”) with.
  • Assess if that is your preferred energy.  (Do you feel exhausted giving that energy to your “enemy”?  If yes – that just might be a fat clue that you’ve adopted non-preferred or unbalanced energy.)


If it’s not your preferred energy – there is no doubt a battle may already be happening or it’s surely brewing.


If it is your preferred energy – great!  But take a look at your “enemy”…


  • Which energy seems to best describe your “enemy”?
  • Do you know if that is their preferred energy?  (If you are doing some alpha-male or alpha-female head butting it may not be their preferred energy).


No matter how much you may think your “enemy” wants you to show non-preferred energy – let your preferred, balanced energy come through…


If you prefer masculine energy – here is one simple approach to try out…


Be decisive – take action to do what you think is best without “trying” to make others happy.


If you prefer feminine energy – here is one simple approach to try out…


Just be – Switch into “observation” mode – observe others and the reactions they elicit within you without trying to fix it, solve it or react openly to it.  Seek to understand and share where you can enable action to flow without emphasis on what you don’t agree with.


If you are feeling like you are on a battlefield – you against your job (your work, boss, or work environment) and you are ready for a change but not sure what direction to go – call me for a free consultation – 888/560-8233 – I’d love to help you get back into balance and figure out your next great job match.


I love this masculine/feminine trait scale I found at thegoodmenproject.com.  I hope it inspires you to share balanced masculine or feminine energy with those you serve



About Gina Calvano

Gina Calvano is a certified coach and Senior Professional in Human Resources, with over 20 years of experience as a talent management professional in both the private and non-profit sectors. With a unique approach, she combines her strategic corporate expertise and accreditations with metaphysics and transformational thinking which has resulted in people all over the world feeling good about themselves and connected to a sense of purpose.

She created the Success Readiness Bootcamp™, a step by step process that enables people to easily discover their unique talents and abilities and match them to majors, jobs, industries and leisure pursuits. Gina is also the co-author of Breakthrough! Inspirational Strategies for an Audaciously Authentic Life with NY Times Best Selling Authors Marci Shimoff, Janet Bray Attwood and Chris Attwood and Powerful Connections Made Easy™ with Aprille Trupiano, and is currently working on her next book — Caged in My Cube: The Turnaround Guide For Loving The Job You Hate.

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